Last updated on 03/12/2022

Questions like, ‘Are you a giver or a taker?’ are so loaded. This is a great time of year to explore your relationship to giving AND receiving to help you find better balance this holiday season and beyond…
Do you prefer shopping for gifts (at this time of year or throughout the year in preparation) or are you all about Christmas (and other days where gifts are exchanged) morning and opening your pressies?
It’s far easier to think about than to practice balance but having some awareness around your conditioning and patterns means you’re more likely to notice the ways in which you might resist accepting what’s freely offered (and wanted – accepting what you don’t want can be as challenging) or ways in which you potentially give more than feels good.
Journal prompts
Maybe you have loved ones who earn way more and/or less than you and struggle to figure out an appropriate amount to spend on each other?
Maybe you overvalue what they offer and undervalue what you offer?
Maybe you forget that money isn’t the only thing that allows us to give – how does your attention, patience, focus and service benefit your loved ones?
Divine Feminine and Masculine
Traditionally, giving, doing and making your mark on the world energies are considered to be masculine while receptive, accepting energies are considered to be feminine.
The masculine is associated with the right side and the feminine is associated with the left side of the body.
We all have the Divine Feminine AND Divine Masculine within us but the world we live in (patriarchal societies for the last several thousand years) mean that many men and women find it far easier to give than to receive..
It can feel safer to give than to be vulnerable to receive – whether that’s a gift, someone’s full attention, time, energy, support and pleasure of any kind.
But this denies others of the opportunity to enjoy giving the way you (if you prefer to give) do.
We need balance.
Mini meditation you can do every time you shower / bathe
I use all sorts of everyday routines to support improvements I’m making in my life and meditative showers are part of this (as is letting go of ALL energies I’m ready to release every time I drain the bath or sink etc etc).
When you put on moisturiser after a shower or bath, you can work with the body’s metaphors to imagine it soothing different areas of your life as well as your skin.
When you get to your right arm and hand, you might imagine getting better at giving what feels GOOD to give (not bone marrow) and what’s valued.
With the left arm and hand, you might imagine getting better at receiving what’s freely offered (and wanted) graciously.
By treating it – as with everything – as information, you’ll become more mindful about getting back into balance when things slip a bit.
How might you flex your receiving (or giving) muscles this holiday season?
Feel free to email eve@selfcarecoaching.net with any questions or comments.
Please feel free to share this post on your social media etc so others who may find it helpful can read it.
With love,


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