potential car for when I learn to drive psychedelic
Now THIS is additional motivation to learn to drive (though friends may be reluctant to accept lifts to and from the airport)

In London, Cardiff, Essex and other places I’ve lived, driving wasn’t necessary. Here, I’m actually getting by fine NOT knowing how to. My rental studio was far further out than I am here and while I don’t relish winter bike rides, I did it in Essex and it’ll be fine when it’s fine here. At least I genuinely like the rain.

Still, I want to know how to drive.

Not so keen on LEARNING how to drive (I’ll be 44 this month) but am more motivated than I’ve ever been at the thought of picking friends up at the airport, exploring beaches, the mountain etc.

And yet, since calling an instructor in May and finding out I needed to do the theory test and pass that before I’m even allowed behind the wheel (if I sound impatient, I’m not, I’m relieved) of a driving instructor’s dual controlled car, I’ve done NOTHING.

I’ve been telling myself that I’ll do it as soon as I get more settled after all the moves. I think this will be early December.

But it’s unlike me to not be on top of it already. Am generally highly motivated and organised.

So I decided to ask myself what I might ask a client not doing something s/he said s/he wanted to be doing.

Why might I be I self-sabotaging with this?

What are the benefits of my NOT being able to drive? How is it serving me?

The biggest thing, I think, is the cycling.

I’m no athlete. I cycle to get around. Slugs often overtake me. My bike has just one gear (chosen for this reason).

Am out tonight and I can have my nose glued to my laptop and screen for work all day because I know I’ll get a good workout cycling into town, walking a bit and cycling home.

If I could drive, I’d be driving into town more often.

Sure, I’d be able to swim more often than is currently manageable but these very ordinary bike rides in and out of town are good for me.

I realise now that I worry I’ll find it too easy to drive everywhere and yet, having not had this basic (to most people) life skill for several decades after most learn it, now that I’m aware of this potential drawback, I can counter it in advance.

I could tell myself that I can drive to my heart’s content AND I can continue to cycle in and out of town maybe a couple of times a week.

I can also be more experimental in terms of driving to other people’s yoga classes and get different types of exercise, too.

I’ll have more choices.

How about you?

What are you not yet doing?

What might be some of the benefits of NOT doing it?

If you’d like my support in exploring and navigating the changes you want to make, you can get in touch to book a free telephone consultation.

And, of course, you can access lots of be your own self care coach resources to help yourself.

Big love,

Eve Menezes Cunningham self care coach therapist supervisor

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